My Journey through 6 months of Unemployment

Many of us have joked about how nice it would be to not have a job and to just retire into the sunset. For many reasons, that is not really a feasible option for most of us, finances likely being the biggest obstacle. While I did not retire, I’m here to share my story of how I took 6 months away from the professional world and what I learned.

Background

My wife, Erica, and I have three daughters: Molly, Taylor, and Charlotte. They’re roughly 2 years apart, and we’re barreling toward the youngest being a teenager in a few short years. When we were expecting our youngest, Charlotte, we started to do the math to understand the full cost of childcare for 3 kids under 5 years of age in order to prepare (as a good financial planner would 😊). We made the decision that Erica would take a break from her career and stay home with the girls. Going from bi-weekly paychecks to daily payment of hugs, dirty diapers, and swole arms from carrying car seats was a tough change, but the memories have proved invaluable. She was able to ease back into work after a few years as a contractor and then back to full time as the girls were all in school and free from the crazy bills of daycare.

Fast forward to late 2023/ early 2024, both Erica and I were in full swing with our careers, and I was even in line for a big promotion. But…the reality the weighed heavily on me was that I was not happy. While I had tremendous schedule flexibility and I was able to be home, I was not present when I was there. We began to observe some relationship gaps arising with our girls, which ultimately led to the realization that I felt called to be a Dad more than to ascend the corporate ladder.

The Transition

Erica and I talked about what this transition would be like in practice and financially for several months Candidly, financial planning for opened-ended unemployment at 40 wasn’t something I thought I would ever do for myself, it was an instructive experience. The planning process also made me extremely grateful for Erica. We were going to be making some changes, and she would be providing the sole income it was pretty cool for her to say it was ‘her turn’ to cover the finances while it was ‘my turn’ to be the go-to for school carpool and trips to Kings Island.

At the office, sitting down to break the news to my partners and team was extremely difficult. I’d built relationships with them in- and outside of work that would come to a halt on a dime. I was happy to be able to share a last meeting with my team that I’d helped to build.. The hardest part for me personally was not being able to let my clients know. Being in the financial service industry, it’s common practice that your day of notice is your last day on the job. Not being able to say goodbye to people you care about and helped through a financial journey was difficult, but they were left in good hands, so that softened the blow a bit.

The Honeymoon Phase

The first couple weeks were a blur. I quickly settled into my new duties as full-time chauffeur for school drop-offs, pickups, and activities. With three active kids, this felt like a full-time job for a while. I read several books within the first couple weeks. I’ve never been a big book reader (more of a podcast guy), so this was big for me. I also binge watched some Netflix. I’d never watched Breaking Bad before (I know, right?). So, for a few months, I felt like I was getting caught up on things where work was just getting in the way.

Summer Time

Having the summer with the girls was great. It took a while for them to realize that they could actually ‘do’ things instead of just sitting around the house all day. We spent days at the pool, riding roller coasters at King’s Island, driving around Kentucky’s bourbon country, and even spent a few afternoons at the mall. But summers go fast in our house between camps and high school sports starting in July. The carefree days pass in a blink. After month 3, it was time for school to start again and I knew I couldn’t stay unemployed much longer. I was getting bored and lacking purpose in my days.

Boredom and the Birth of a Business

As the girls spent more time out of the house and I had more time on my hands, I started thinking more about my exit strategy. Deep down, I always knew I would want to start my own firm someday, I just didn’t know when. I decided it was time to make the commitment and start the process of building a business. Throughout my career, I’ve been fortunate to have some excellent opportunities that gave me exposure not just to financial planning, but also to the mechanics of how an advisory firm works. Since the financial services industry is well regulated, this was going to take some time. When I’ve made up my mind to do something, I prefer to take action quickly, so the next several months were long, but in November of 2024, my new firm gained state approval, and we were ready to serve.

What I Learned

In my career, I’ve helped a lot of people financially retire, and it was a great learning experience to get a small taste of what ‘every day is Saturday’ feels like. One of the quips I stole from an advisor years ago was that in order to retire, you need to have enough, have had enough, and you need something to do. Going through this exercise made me realize I hadn’t checked any of those three boxes.

My relationship with my girls and Erica has greatly improved. I am moderately well versed in speaking ‘Gen Z language’ so I can use ‘Sigma,’ ‘Rizzler’, and ‘Sus’ all in proper context. This should be helpful in connecting with future generations in my work 😊. I will borrow from a bit that Jerry Seinfeld did here: “it’s not able spending quality time with your kids, it’s about the garbage time.” Running kids to practice, friends, and school always felt like a chore, because everything was a rush and my mind was always on something else. Just being present for some “garbage time” with your kids can really make a difference.

I still want to work. After the honeymoon phase ended and summer began to wind down, I had the itch to get back to working with clients. The work gave me great pride and a purpose that I wasn’t ready to give up completely. However, this time, I intend to have more balance. I will also use being an entrepreneur as an experience my girls can learn from as they go through high school, college, and eventually start their own careers.

Should you Consider it?

Taking extended time off your job isn’t for everyone (that’s probably stating the obvious). I consider myself extremely fortunate to be in a position where I could make the choice on my terms. We are not immune to the consequences of zeroing out my income. We had to make sacrifices, we cut way back on eating out, cooked more food, shopped smarter, held off on big ticket items, paused some unnecessary services, and I even downsized my car to cut expenses. With that in mind, if the scales of benefits and sacrifice balance for you, I believe no option should be taken off the table. It is always worth considering what you would need to do if you found yourself unexpectedly unemployed, so consult with a trusted advisor if you’re looking for help there. Otherwise, my advice if you’re trying to find some balance with your kids without leaving your job, clear your head and be there for garbage time.